My Physical Rehab Has Come To An End

Sunday, 11th September, packing my stuff
I’m standing in my room, packing up my stuff. My playlist is set on random and plays “where does the good go”. Since they played it on Grey’s Anatomy I always connect this song with goodbye. And this is what it is. Goodbye.
The past 3 weeks I’ve been in this physical rehab facility and when I arrived I never could have known how those 3 weeks would end.
I remember the day of my arrival, it was very chaotic and for me an exhausting day. Soon I was able to adjust to my new daily routine I had here. Though I’ll never get used to waking up early the routine truly had a lot of benefits. The days being planned by the computer took some weight off my shoulders. It’s weird thinking that it makes life easier when you don’t have to think about what you have to do today. There’s a set schedule.
The biggest adjustment though was that every single day the whole day was about me and my needs. You know at home you have to think about work, your company, family, friends, pets, etc. But here it’s all about you and your health. That was a whole new experience and it was a nice one. It’s something I want to continue to do at home. I come first. My health comes first. If I’m not healthy how can I be there for anybody else? I’ve always done that and it’s obvious that it wasn’t working. I need to listen to my body and do what’s best for me.
I cannot guarantee that I will change my life completely but I can promise I’ll try.
I made friends here. I laughed. I cried. It’s been a rollercoaster but a good one.
I was able to do stuff that I like. I read 7 books and wrote on my own book. I played card and board games with friends and visited some nice places in the area.

Sunday, 11th September, after packing
🎵All my bags are packed, I’m ready to go 🎵
Now I’ve finished packing I feel a little strange. I got used to this life here so quick that I feel like I don’t want to go back home. I don’t feel ready. When I’m back home there are a lot of things that I need to organise and I feel the stress already when I think about it. There’s no way of getting around it. I learned so much here, especially about my eating disorder and how to eat healthy. In 18 days I lost 2 kilos even though I ate 3 times a day here vs 2 times a day at home. I learned about what kind of food my body needs and I hope I’ll be able to continue this diet at home. I definitely want to, it’s just difficult cooking for one person.
I also learned a lot about sports. Before I came here sports was always something exhausting and annoying in my mind. I always connected it with running and I hate running a lot. But I learned here that there’s no need to run at all and sports don’t need to be an hour. In this physical rehab facility I had daily therapys and a lot of them included exercise but one unit was always 20 minutes. It was cycling, nordic walking, athletic, swimming or physio. It all was more or less fun, none of them was something I dreaded. And that’s definitely something I will take home with me. Moving your body can be fun 😉 There’s also no need to go to a gym, there’s a lot of exercises you can do at home. I’ll try and post some on my Insta stories.
The biggest challenge at home will be reducing my work schedule which means quitting two of my three jobs and making more time for myself. But it is something that’s very much needed. And I already quit one job from here and that’s something I’m very proud of. Because those are jobs that I actually like so it was pretty hard for me. But self-care is very important and I need to start now before it is too late for my body. The doctor who did my surgery told me that I’d need a new knee by the time I’ll be 40 years old because my knee is so damaged. I met a lot of people here with a new knee and it’s definitely something I want to avoid. I believe with training, a healthy diet and self-care I can prove him wrong. Now that I have the knowledge all that’s left is doing it. I will try!

Monday, 12th September, after my last therapy
My last training session is done and I gave everything and set new personal records. I’m so proud of myself and honestly I have never sweated so much in my life. Even though I did some sports here and there and a lot during my childhood I never did it right. Same goes for food. I never ate right. I learned it all here and I’m so thankful for that. I feel like I got all the tools I needed here to start a better, healthier life and I’m looking forward to doing that. I have never felt so blessed and powerful. And even though there’ll always be ups and downs I know I am beautiful, I am powerful, I am free.